Shara Grove Holistics

Alexdria. A gorgeous beach babe woman. Murky blonde waves that flowed past her shoulders. Seashells covering her neck, wrists and ankles. Deep green eyes that hid a world of fantasy in them.

Alexdria is from a past life of mine I have explored, but something remarkable about this is that she is from a different planet. A completely different universe. She looks human, if not a bit taller than average with more muscle mass. The ‘humans’ there are similar to us but more advanced. They’re faster, smarter and stronger, as well as their senses being heightened and more tactful. They live with their land and are connected to all beings. How do I know for sure it was a different planet? The sun never sets. The planet was entirely coastal with each piece of land housing different groups/tribes. Their sun was this bright big ball of white light that lit up every inch of the planet. The ocean sparkled and danced. The land was rich with fruits, supplies and culture. The people there only slept when they were tired, only ate when they were hungry, the vibe was incredibly laid back through intuitive living connected to themselves and their land.

Alexdria, a beautiful woman I first saw at around mid-twenty years old. She was a slight outcast. Quiet, only spoke comfortably with certain people and preferred to be in the background than center of attention. You’d usually find her creating items with the land such as shell instruments, body wares and rock designs. Or each year, you’d find her at the same spot by the ocean front, waiting for the whales to come by.

Every year Alexdria would wait for the whales to call her. Like a whisper in her ear for her to come home and be with her family. Every year she’d wait and as soon as she heard their calls, she’d race out to be with them.

She was her happiest when she was with her whale family, these big beautiful gentle creatures. Dark blue tops, sky blue underneath and eyes that held so many secrets. They were her home, her true family. She’d be able to swim around with them almost as though she was one. She’s watched the girls become mothers and mothers become matriarchs. Alexdria glistened with the ocean when she was with her whales.

They understood her. They felt her longing for family that truly deep down accepted her for who she was. They welcomed her into theirs. They felt her safety and her trust. They heard her inner cries and silence. They spoke through thoughts and body language, a connection that so few had. It couldn’t be denied that Alexdria was one of them.

Alexdria went through life, found a partner and had a family with him. She had a picture-perfect life on the outside, and on the inside, she knew it too. She loved her partner and the children they had created. She loved the home she designed and the life they lived, but there was a part her that was sad. A part of her that wanted to be out there.

As she aged she would still wait to hear the calls every year, but it was getting harder and harder to be out there for as long as she wanted. She found it hard to battle with being grateful for the time she had with the whales and the depression that was creeping in of not having enough time with them.

She felt wrong for feeling such a way when she had so much good in her life, but she couldn’t help it. Her whale family were her family from the beginning. Her happiest memories were with them. Her most freeing feeling was around them. There was an understanding between human and creature that even she found hard to fathom at times. She still longed for them again.

On her last day there was a family get together. It was a great day, lots of laughter, games and fun. Little did the family know that Alexdria had planned this get together as a way of saying goodbye. It was that time of the year and she was ready to leave. The day went on and she heard the call. A smile came across her face, but her eyes started to well up. She didn’t say any goodbyes, but merely slipped away from the crowd, down to the ocean front where she saw her family blowing and jumping in the distance. She let out a big sigh, smiled brightly and made her way out to the whales, where she never returned to land.

There’s something deeply moving and beautiful I find about this life. There’s a lot of it that connects deeply to me and my current life here. The subconscious showed me this life for a reason and these are my interpretations:

My connection with animals has never been doubted, I have a connection with them. We have an understanding of each other. We understand boundaries, emotions and energy. I’ve always found comfort in being in the company of animals, no matter what they are. I sometimes feel like I look into their eyes and see so much history there. So much power, grace, empathy and at times fear. There is a block between humans and animals which I try my hardest to break through. They want to be understood and heard just like we do. They want respect but they don’t demand it, unlike we do. I truly believe that if we lived more in tune with the land the world would be a much better place, we’d be able to live in harmony. Sadly, this isn’t the case with this current world, and for a chunk of my life it wasn’t the case for me either, however there was a change that happened. I tapped into a deeper knowing within and found gratitude, freedom and peace in being grounded with nature, in opening myself up to other sentients and going more with the flow rather than being structured.

I’ve gone through life feeling like the outcast, the different one or the weird one. Making friends hasn’t ever really been easy for me as I tend to make friends through chance rather than intentional meetings. I’m still yet to find my tribe, a group where I feel at home with others. Alexdria was the strange one, but her beauty inside and out is what stopped her from getting ridiculed (something I believe stopped me from facing the same sort of ridicule). The difference between Alexdria and me is that she had always remained true to herself. She never changed for others, she never altered to fit in. What she felt mattered and what mattered to her was important to who she was. I haven’t always been true to myself. Since a young age I fabricated myself to make myself seem more interesting. I told lies, made up false personas and characters. It wasn’t up until I met Léon where I really dropped all walls and facades.

Not everyone in life is going to understand me, and that’s okay. I’ve always had this fear of being misunderstood. That what if I say something and it is interpreted in a way that I mean for it to be. Social ques can be tricky for me to understand, and I think so far, I’ve spent most of my life being hyperaware of that. It sucks that I went through all of my years before this being hyperaware of my behaviours, mannerisms and ques, but what I’m trying to re-learn now is that, if I show authenticity, it wouldn’t matter how I acted or spoke because authenticity only attracts other authentics.

Something I admire about Alexdria is the respect she had for her life and in turn the respect she received. She knew she was an outcast, she knew she had other names called behind her back, but that didn’t stop her from being her. That didn’t get in the way of her true happiness. It didn’t stop her from feeling freedom and it didn’t sabotage her connect with the whales. How beautiful is that. Her family loved her for who she was. Her partner loved her for who she was and accepted that at that time of the year, the whales came first. His love for her never stood in the way of Alandria’s love for the whales. That is true beauty.

There are of course some additional reasons I find in exploring this past life:

• Family can be anything
• Not everyone will understand but they care
• Use love, passion and light to direct you
• It’s okay to enjoy life and the moments in it
• Be the weird one, that is what will bring you the most
• There is no reason to hide who you are
• You’re a seasonal being, it’s time to tap back into it

Alexdria. A true free soul with so much beauty to share.